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This probably doesn't need to be said, but there is not really such a thing as
the "Native
American" wedding ceremony. There are, of course, ways in which couples who
cherish their Native American ancestors can honor their heritage. Native
American is a term that refers to hundreds of tribes, each with their own
traditions and beliefs. If you wish to have a wedding ceremony recognized by a
specific tribe, you really must contact the tribe itself to inquire how that
would be done. If you wish to include earth-based spirituality or Native
American elements in your wedding ceremony, than I can be of assistance.
The Manataka American Indian Council has a wonderful
on-line reference for couples interested in
American Indian wedding ceremonies.
Below is an example of a ceremony I performed for a couple wishing to honor
their shared Native American spirituality. The groom had been raised on a
reservation, but the wedding was held here in Florida at the beach. They wanted
to use elements that come from a variety of tribes and we did not have
permission to use fire. We adapted to their circumstances and ended up with an
absolutely gorgeous ceremony at sunset.
- Smudging
- Words of Welcome
- Reading:
Commitment Reading of the Pueblo Indian
- Placing of the Blankets
- Affirmation of the Couple
- Exchange of Vows
- Blessing of the Rings
- Exchange of Rings
- Exchange of Blankets
- Native American Wedding Vase
- Blessing of the Marriage: Cherokee Prayer
- Declaration of Marriage
Smudging
There was no processional for this wedding ceremony. When the guests had
gathered, an elderly female relative circled the pavilion fanning the smoke from
the burning dried sage with a feather fan. Then the bride and groom entered
together with their parents.
Words of Welcome
It
is with great pleasure we gather this day to witness the joining of two
beautiful and loving people in marriage. ____ and ____ have opened their hearts
to one another, and today we are blessed as they open their hearts to us as
well, inviting us to witness and share in this glorious moment. We celebrate
their union in a natural setting to honor the gifts of the Creator--the gifts of
nature's bounty and the gift of love between man and woman. ____ and ____ bring
the fullness of their being as a treasure to share with one another. Their
marriage is being entered into reverently, with the recognition of a true and
faithful union. For what greater joy is there for two human souls than to join
together to strengthen each other in all their endeavors?
Reading Commitment
Reading of the Pueblo Indian
At this time I invite ____ to come
forward to read.
Before we met, you and I were halves unjoined except in the wide rivers of
our minds. We were each other's distant shore, the opposite wings of a bird, the
other half of a seashell. We did not know the other then, did not know our
determination to keep alive the cry of one riverbank to the other. We were
apart, yet connected in our ignorance of each other, like two apples sharing a
common tree. Remember?
I knew you existed long before you understood my desire to
join my freedom to yours. Our paths collided long enough for our indecision to
be swallowed up by the greater need of love. When you came to me, the sun surged
towards the earth and moon escaped from darkness to bless the union of two
spirits, so alike that the creator had designed them for life's endless circle.
Beloved partner, keeper of my heart's odd secrets, clothed in summer blossoms so
the icy hand of winter never touches us. I thank your patience. Our joining is
like a tree to earth, a cloud to sky and even more. We are the reason the world
can laugh on its battlefields and rise from the ashes of its selfishness to hear
me say, in this time, this place, this way - I loved you best of all.
Placing of the Blankets
The bride and groom's parents placed blue blanket shawls
over their children's shoulders. The blankets represent their lives before they
found one another.
Affirmation of the Couple
(Section of personalized content for the bride and groom that included what they
cared most about each other, what they wanted for their marriage and their
commitment to honor their ancestors, the environment and their descendents.)
_____ and ______, make the meaning of the vows you are about to share with one
another deepen as the years pass and seek to discover the endless possibilities
of this life together. Your love and your union must endure through daily
routine, but flower in both adversity and joy. Throughout your marriage, embrace
your passion, revel in your companionship and cherish your intimacy. Give to one
another new experiences of joy. Challenge one another so that you may grow.
Never take each other for granted, but truly experience the wonder of your
union. Be slow to anger, quick to forgive, leaving no traces of resentment
behind each day. Be a source of strength and inspiration to yourselves, your
families, your friends, and to all whose lives you touch. Love is stronger than
your conflicts and grander than life's changes. It is a gift always inviting you
to learn and to grow. It is to love that you must always return. Renew the vows
you are about to exchange regularly and endeavor to keep them vibrant and fresh
in your loving hearts forever.
Exchange of Vows
The couple chose to read self-written vows to one
another followed by a combined responsive vow.
Bride, please share with us your vows to Groom.
The bride read her vows.
Groom, please share with us your vows to Bride.
The groom read his vows.
Do you, ____ and _____, pledge to treat one another with
respect and compassion; praise one another often and criticize rarely; quarrel
in private and tell no strangers of your discord; support and encourage your
individuality within the context of a strong and loving union of equals?
We do.
Blessing of the Rings
_____ and _____ have
chosen wooden rings as an outward sign of their internal commitment. The
material used to make these rings had a previous noble life before its
transformation to a new life of beauty reminding us that the gifts of nature and
the creativity of humankind can come together in ways that ennoble us and honor
our world. These rings are symbols that remind us of the sun that shines above
us and the Earth beneath us. They are freely offered as gifts of faith and hope
as visible signs of the promises given this day. In this moment, bring blessings
to these rings to be symbols of unity, commitment and renewal.
Exchange of Rings
____, please look into ____'s eyes repeating after me as
you place the ring upon his/her finger.
Come health,
happiness, and prosperity,
I will stand with
you;
come illness,
trouble, or poverty,
I will stand with
you.
I give you this
ring
as a sign of my
love and commitment.
Exchange of Blankets
The parents stepped forward and removed the blue blanket
shawls from the bride and groom's shoulders. The grandmother's stepped forward
and placed one large white blanket shawl around both of them representing their
unity and wishes for a happy future together. It made the wedding vase a little
tricky so I would recommend moving this portion of the ceremony to just prior to
the blessing of the marriage.
Native American Wedding Vase
____ and _____ have just sealed their relationship with the giving and receiving
of rings. Today their union is further symbolized by partaking from the Native
American wedding vase. The wedding vase has two spouts coming from the same
vessel. As individuals, you have had different experiences and bring together
different strengths. The two spouts of the wedding vase represent each of you as
individuals. As husband and wife, you will continue to be individuals, yet you
will always drink from the same vessel of life. _____ and _____, as you share
this one water from two spouts, so may each of you share contentment, comfort
and happiness from the common cup of your marriage. May you find life's joys
great, its bitterness sweetened and all things enriched by your companionship
and your love.
The bride and groom each drank from the wedding vase while a friend played a
Native American flute.
Blessing of the Marriage
Great Spirit protect the ones we love. We honor all you
created as we pledge our hearts and lives together. We honor mother-earth and
ask for our marriage to be abundant and grow stronger through the seasons; We
honor fire and ask that our union be warm and glowing with love in our hearts.
We honor wind and ask we sail through life safe and calm as in our father’s
arms. We honor water to clean and soothe our relationship that it may never
thirst for love. With all the forces of the universe you created, we pray for
harmony and true happiness as we forever grow young together. Amen.
Declaration of Marriage
As ____ and ____
have pledged their lives to one another in our presence, it is with great honor
we recognize them as husband and wife, now and forever. |
Native American
