
One of the first things I tell couples in a consultation is that the wedding
ceremony concludes much sooner than anyone expects. I once officiated a wedding
with a processional, Presentation of the Bride, opening words, reading, homily on
marriage, very long (it felt like it anyway) self-written vows, ring exchange,
unity candle, second reading, blessing, declaration of marriage, and recessional
that lasted a whopping 17 minutes.
If you would like to include anything beyond the required vow exchange and
declaration of marriage it is unlikely to add more than a minute or two to the
overall length of the service. This is your day and your relationship. If you
have a reading that perfectly describes your relationship, have someone read it.
If you like the symbolism of the vessel and rose ritual, do it.
Here are some sample Orders of Service for weddings that last approximately
fifteen minutes.
Note: The Presentation of the Bride is when the officiant asks "Who
brings this woman to be married this day?" and the Affirmation of Marriage
(also referred to as Charge to the Couple, Admonition to the Couple or Challenge
to the Couple) is a few words about the realities of marriage providing a smooth transition to the vow exchange.
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Processional
Presentation of the Bride
Opening
Words
Reading
Affirmation of Marriage
Exchange
of Vows
Exchange
of Rings
Wine
Ceremony
Declaration
of Marriage
Recessional |
Opening
Words
Blessing
of the Parents
Reading
Affirmation of Marriage
Exchange
of Vows
Blessing
of the Hands
Exchange
of Rings
Musical
Interlude
Sand
Ceremony
Declaration
of Marriage |
Processional
Opening Words
Blessing
Homily on Marriage
Exchange of Vows
Exchange of Rings
Vessel and Rose Ritual
Unity Candle
Declaration of Marriage
Recessional |
As you can see, these three weddings have exactly the same number of elements
but are completely different in tone and content. There is no such thing as
"the right way" to do a wedding.
Here is a "long" wedding
Processional
Presentation of the Bride
Opening Words with Memorial Statement
Reading
Flower Presentation to Mothers
Blessing of the Parents
Community Vow of Support
Statement of Intent
Affirmation of Marriage
Exchange of Vows
Blessing of the Hands
Exchange of Rings
Unity Candle
Reading
Bell of Truce
Blessing
Declaration of Marriage
Introduction of the Couple
Recessional
Whopping 25 minutes! I told you weddings go faster than you think.
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