Child Dedications, Memorial Services and Other Rites and Rituals

Opening Words:

Let us be honest with death. Let us not pretend that it is less than it is. It is separation. It is sorrow. It is grief. But let us neither pretend that death is more than it is. It is not annihilation. As long as memory endures, ____’s influence will be felt.. It is not an end to love—humanity’s need for love from each of us is boundless. It is not an end to joy and laughter—nothing would less honor a soul than to make our lives drab in counterfeit respect. Let us be honest with death, for in that honesty we will understand him better and ourselves more deeply.

Candle Lighting:

Though our spirit be but the feeble glow of a single flame, for the one who keeps it burning bravely to the end, death is not defeat. We light our candle today to honor the life and living of ____.

Reading:

As he was particularly drawn to the ocean and loved sailing this poem from Henry Van Dyke is recited in ____’s honor.

Gone From My Sight

I am standing upon the seashore.

A ship at my side spreads her white

sails to the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean.

She is an object of beauty and strength

I stand and watch her until at length

she hangs like a speck of white cloud

just where the sea and sky come

to mingle with each other

Then someone at my side says;

"There, she is gone!"

"Gone where?"

Gone from my sight. That is all.

She is just as large in mast and hull

and spar as she was when she left my side

and she is just as able to bear her

load of living freight to her destined port.

Her diminished size is in me, not in her.

And just at the moment when someone

at my side says, "There, she is gone!"

There are other eyes watching her coming,

and other voices ready to take up the glad

shout, "Here she comes!"

And that is dying.

Address:

We have gathered here to acknowledge the passing of ___, who was known and well-loved. When someone we cherish dies, family and friends gather with sorrow in their hearts. At times when we must face death and loss, we need one another’s company for understanding and support. Just to be together, to look into one another’s faces, takes away some of our loneliness and draws our hearts together in the healing we can offer one another. At such times, the various faiths that sustain us separately come together in a harmony that acts across all creeds and assures us of the permanence for human goodness and hope.

So we have gathered here this evening in grief and sorrow, but we have also gathered to celebrate a life. We have come together to give thanks that we knew him, to express our gratitude for the days and years we were able to share with him. We are here to remember and memorialize a man who knew the pleasure of hard work and felt most at home in a natural environment.

By remembering the best of this person, by recalling our fondest memories, by honoring the principles, values and dreams which guided his life, some of ____’s enduring qualities flow into us, that we ourselves might experience his guidance in the days ahead.

Sharing from Family and Friends:

We are here for all these things. But our first spiritual task is to face, full and unafraid, the reality of this death. We best do that by sharing with one another. I invite you at this time to share your thoughts about ____ this evening.

<Personal Remembrances>

Reading:

In keeping with ___’s appreciation for nature I thought perhaps this perspective on death might be fitting.

Do not stand at my grave and weep;

I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.

I am the diamond glints on snow.

I am the sunlight on ripened grain.

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning's hush

I am the swift uplifting rush

Of quiet birds in circled flight.

I am the soft stars that shine at night.

Do not stand at my grave and cry;

I am not there, look to the sky.

Closing Words:

Leaves should not fall in early summer. Winter should not follow on the heels of spring. Yet when they do, we can and must speak for life. For there is no answer to death but to live vigorously and beautifully. We give respect and dignity to the one we mourn only when we respect and dignify life and move toward its richest fulfillment.

Let us honor the life of ____ by living, ourselves, more nobly and lovingly in the days ahead. As you return to the routines of your lives, go in great peace, dear friends, and may an abiding peace go with you.

Other Rites

Child Dedication Ceremony

Memorial Service

Gone From My Sight