Sample Weddings

Beach Weddings
Multiple Elements
Non-denominational Christian
Unitarian Universalist
Contemporary Jewish
Civil / Non-Religious
A Celtic Flavour
Buddhist
African American
Native American
New Year's Theme
Symbolic Ceremony
Commitment Service
Spanish

• Ceremony One (three questions of intent / blessing, gift of vessel and rose)
• Ceremony Two (self-presentation of the couple, flower ceremony)

Many people assume a civil service is a short dry wedding that is essentially a cookie cutter ceremony non-religious people must resort to with a Justice of the Peace or Notary Public. Not true! Whether a religious humanist, non-theist or simply a desire to place the focus on the union rather than on any particular religious beliefs, a civil service is just the thing and can be as beautiful and meaningful as a religious wedding. Indeed, many of the sample weddings on my site would be considered civil services.

• Ceremony Three (absence of any sacramental language, tasting of the four elements)

Ceremony One

• Opening Words
• Questions of Intent and Blessing
• Reading: On Love by Thomas Kempis
• Affirmation of Marriage
• Exchange of Vows
• Exchange of Rings
• The Gift of the Vessel and the Rose
• Marriage Blessing
• Declaration of Marriage

Opening Words

We gather at this hour to joyfully witness the union of ____ and ____. Today they publicly pledge themselves to one another in the presence of those who have vowed to bless and support their marriage in the coming days, months and years.

We welcome you, who have been special in this couple‘s lives. By witnessing their marriage ceremony today, ______ and _____ ask you to share in their future. Marriage is a promise, made in the hearts of two people who love each other, which takes a lifetime to fulfill. Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important relationships.

Today they create a new circle of love dependent upon the foundations they each bring to this union.

Questions of Intent and Blessing

Do those who have nurtured and raised this man and this woman, bless this marriage, pledge to support them through good times and bad, and present this couple to be joined in sacred matrimony?

Bride and Groom’s parents/family respond, "We do"

Do those who have presented themselves at this hour of commitment, through familial ties and bonds of friendship, bless this marriage and pledge to support _____ and ____ in good times and bad.

Guests respond, “We do.”

Do you, ____ and _____ come to your marriage reverently, advisedly, sincerely and soberly?

Bride and Groom respond, “We do.”

Reading

And now, ________, will read “On Love” by Thomas Kempis

Love is a mighty power,
a great and complete good.
Love alone lightens every burden, and makes rough places smooth.
It bears every hardship as though it were nothing, and renders
all bitterness sweet and acceptable.

Nothing is sweeter than love,
Nothing stronger,
Nothing higher,
Nothing wider,
Nothing more pleasant,
Nothing fuller or better in heaven or earth; for love is born of God.

Love flies, runs and leaps for joy.
It is free and unrestrained.
Love knows no limits, but ardently transcends all bounds.
Love feels no burden, takes no account of toil,
attempts things beyond its strength.

Love sees nothing as impossible,
for it feels able to achieve all things.
It is strange and effective,
while those who lack love faint and fail.

Love is not fickle and sentimental,
nor is it intent on vanities.
Like a living flame and a burning torch,
it surges upward and surely surmounts every obstacle.

Affirmation of Marriage

_____ and ______ , it is our great pleasure to bear witness to the covenant you make with one another. Our hopes and dreams align with yours and convey upon you the blessings for a long and happy marriage.

_____ and ____, one of the greatest surprises of marriage is how much it strengthens you as an individual. Although you will each change over the years, a healthy union will find you even more committed then you are at this moment despite the inevitable changes. Embrace these changes and celebrate the contributions this growth makes to your marriage.

You have shared with me how your senses of humor are of the qualities you both love most about each other. This is a wonderful gift as marriage includes the absurdity as well as the gravity of life. Find reason to laugh loudly and often, even when times seem grave indeed. A house full of laughter is a home and a refuge. Guard it well.

Exchange of Vows

______ and ____, your family and friends witness your vows. And your officiant solemnizes your vows. But the sacrament of marriage is formalized exclusively by the mutual exchange of pledges between you. Only you can breathe life into these words and transform them into a meaningful union of heart, body and soul.

______ and _____ please turn to one another and look in each other’s eyes as you repeat after me.


You, ______, are the love of my life,
my reason for living,
the inspiration I have always sought.
I pledge my undying dedication to you
for the rest of my life.
I love you with all of my heart and soul
and know that as long as you are next to me
I give my life to you
to ensure your happiness and well being.
I, _____, take your hand and hold you to be, my wife/husband.
I vow to look upon you forever
with dedication, understanding, and unconditional love.

Exchange of Rings

Bless these rings, symbols of eternity and forgiveness. They are a reminder that love is never ending, but instead can be renewed at any time and place of our choosing. May these rings grace the loving hands of _____ and _____ with a joyful and nurturing presence, symbolic of the eternal love and faithfulness they pledge to one another.

Please repeat after me as you place the ring on ____’s finger.

_______, this ring has no end or beginning,
it signifies the continuation of true love.
As I place it on your finger
with a pledge of love and faithfulness,
I give you all that I am and ever hope to be.

The Gift of the Vessel and Rose

_____ and _____ have chosen to share two symbolic gifts, The Marriage Vessel and the Rose, to symbolize their life-long commitment to one another.

The spiritual roots of this ceremony grow out of an understanding of creation, one gift (presenting the vessel) crafted lovingly by human hands, the other (holding up the rose) brought forth by the glories of nature.

This vessel is a symbol of love's strength and endurance. The miracle of the vessel is that it not only protects, but is enriched and ennobled by that which it holds.

Likewise, the rose born of the tiniest of seeds, symbolizes both the beauty and the potential of love that blooms and grows through time. Both the vessel and the rose are individually unique, yet when combined, they create an object of even greater beauty.

The groom presents the vessel to the bride and says:
“_______, this vessel represents the strength I see in you. I thank you for the person you are and the person I am becoming because of your love for me.”

The bride presents the rose to the groom:
“________, this rose represents the beauty I see in you. I thank you for the love and care you have given me and for all we will share together in this life.”

Groom then places the rose in the vessel, they hold it together and say:

“As our gifts bring beauty and purpose to each other may our lives continue to enrich and strengthen one another.”

[Officiant]

_____ and ______, as you share each passing day and as your days become years remember this tradition you have created. On each wedding anniversary, place an additional rose in your marriage vessel to demonstrate your ever growing love for one another. May this gift always be a visual symbol of the beauty and strength you bring to your life together.

Blessing of the Marriage

Life and love are the greatest gifts bestowed upon humanity.
May your union grant you patience, tolerance, and understanding
as well as the passion and excitement every marriage should possess.
May you need one another, as a sign of strength.
May you hunger for one another, as a sign of fulfillment.
May you enchant one another, as a sign of harmony.
May you embrace one another, as a sign of unity.
May you support one another, as a sign of mutual independence.
May you continually rediscover your love in one another, as the greatest gift of all.

Declaration of Marriage

______________ and _________________, you have pledged your faith and declared your unity with the exchange of vows and the giving and receiving of rings. As you are now joined together in mutual esteem and devotion, it is my joy and privilege, as a duly ordained minister in the state of Florida, to pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride.

 

Ceremony Two

• Self-presentation of the Couple
• Opening Words
• Reading: Why Marriage? by Mari Nichols-Haining
• Affirmation of Marriage
• Exchange of Vows
• Exchange of Rings
• Flower Ceremony
• Marriage Blessing
• Declaration of Marriage

Self-presentation of the Couple

Minister: Who presents this couple to be married?

Couple: "We present ourselves freely and unreservedly."

Opening Words

We are gathered here before friends, family and community to honor and acknowledge the relationship you wish to formally declare to all whom you encounter. Even though you join one another in unity today, your individuality must never be lost but celebrated. As you seek to enter this public declaration of your love, strive to make real the ideals conveying meaning to this ceremony. The pledges made this day strengthen your union. They will cross years and touch the lives of many people, helping them develop a true sense of love and commitment. 

Reading

Why Marriage?
By: Mari Nichols-Haining

Because to the depths of me, I long to love one person,
With all my heart, my soul, my mind, my body...

Because I need a forever friend to trust with the intimacies of me,
Who won't hold them against me,
Who loves me when I'm unlikable,
Who sees the small child in me, and
Who looks for the divine potential of me...

Because I need to cuddle in the warmth of the night
With someone who thanks God for me,
With someone I feel blessed to hold...

Because marriage means opportunity
To grow in love in friendship...
Because marriage is a discipline
To be added to a list of achievements...

Because marriages do not fail, people fail
When they enter into marriage
Expecting another to make them whole...

Because, knowing this,
I promise myself to take full responsibility
For my spiritual, mental and physical wholeness
I create me,
I take half of the responsibility for my marriage
Together we create our marriage...

Because with this understanding

The possibilities are endless.

Affirmation of Marriage

Love is the highest testament to the worth and dignity of humankind. It reduces selfishness, deepens our personalities, and makes life more meaningful. By it’s very nature it inspires us to give of ourselves and to share the joy of what is given to us. Such love calls forth the best qualities in each of you.

Marriage is a public proclamation of the precious values and warmth arising from human companionship and love. Therefore, it is not to be entered into lightly, but with certainty, with respect; and with a sense of reverence which certainly includes acknowledgment of its beauty, humor and joy as well as its gravity.

Our celebration today is the outward expression of a sacred internal commitment. Such a union can only be created by loving purpose, maintained by abiding will and renewed by human feelings, intentions and actions. 

Exchange of Vows

____________ and _____________ please turn towards one another and look into each other’s eyes as I ask you to pledge your intentions. (Bride then Groom), please repeat after me. 

(Name), you have filled my life with meaning.

You have made me so happy

and I am blessed you accept me as I am;

loving me, and bringing me into your heart.

I promise to always love you,

respect you as an individual,

and be faithful forever.

Today I commit myself to our union,

now and forever.

Exchange of Rings

The wedding ring is a symbol of eternity as a circle is the symbol of the sun and the earth and the universe, of wholeness and perfection, and peace and love. It is an outward sign of an inward and spiritual bond uniting two hearts in endless love.

(Bride / Groom) please repeat after me as you place the ring on your beloved's hand.

(Name), this ring I give to you 

as a token of my love and devotion. 

I pledge to you all that I am 

and all that I will ever be 

as your (husband / wife). 

With this ring, 

I proudly marry you 

and join my life to yours. 

Flower Ceremony

______ and _______ have invited you here today because they consider you an important part of their union. Your presence today helps sanctify the public proclamation of a personal desire to unite as one. _____ and ______ wish to represent your continued presence in the life of their marriage and invite you to come forward and place a flower in this vase representing your blessings and support of their union. As you place the flower in the vase please keep foremost in your mind and heart your best wishes for the strength and beauty of _____ and _____'s marriage.

<Musical Interlude as guests are motioned to come forward by row to place their flower in the vase.>

______ and ______, your friends and family have shared with your their desire and blessings for a successful marriage. Honor their support by the loving words, compassionate acts and caring deeds that will govern your marriage. Display this floral arrange in a prominent location in your home that in times of discord you may turn to its beauty and remember this day so that all disagreements may be resolved with respect and loving kindness.

Blessing of the Marriage

As spring unfolds the dream of the earth,

May you bring each other's hearts to birth.

As the ocean finds calm in view of land.

May you love the gaze of each other's mind.

As the wind arises free and wild,

May nothing negative control your lives.

As kindly as moonlight might search the dark,

So gentle may you be when light grows scarce.

As surprised as the silence that music opens,

May your words for each other be touched with reverence.

As warmly as the air draws in the light,

May you welcome each other's every gift.

As elegant as dream absorbing the night,

May sleep find you clear of anger and hurt.

As twilight harvests all the day's colour,

May love bring you home to each other. 

Declaration of Marriage

What love has united, let no one divide. ____________ and ____________ , you have told me and your loved ones gathered here of your intent to join in marriage, solemnized by your vows and the giving and receiving of rings. Therefore, with great joy and by the authority vested in me by state of Florida I do hereby pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride!

Ceremony Three

• Presentation of the Couple
• Opening Words
• Honoring the Parents
• Reading from "Union" by Robert Fulghum
• Affirmation of Marriage
• Statement of Intent
• Exchange of Vows
• Exchange of Rings
• Tasting of the Four Elements
• Closing Words
• Declaration of Marriage

Who presents this man and this woman to be united in marriage?

Families respond “We do.”

We are gathered here this day, not to witness a beginning of what shall be, but to celebrate and affirm what already is. __________ and __________ have invited you to share the public declaration of what has already been united in their hearts. Their wedding celebrates the joy and beauty of life.

Marriage is a supreme sharing of experience and an adventure in the most intimate of human relationships. It is the joyous uniting of a man and a woman whose comradeship and mutual understanding have blossomed into romance. Today, _____ and ______ proclaim their love to the world and we who are gathered here rejoice with them and for the new life they now undertake together.

When two people come together, it is right and good that they give thanks to those who nurtured them. Today, ________ and ______ would like to give honor to _______________ and _____________, and all those whose love and support have made this day possible. They present their families with a small token of their esteem.

<couple presents their parents with a gift of their choosing>

At this time I would like to invite ____ to come forward and read from "UNION" by Robert Fulghum.

You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making promises and agreements in an informal way. All those conversations that were held riding in a car or over a meal or during long walks - all those sentences that began with “When we’re married” and continued with “I will and you will and we will”- those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe”- and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding. The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “ You know all those things we’ve promised and hoped and dreamed- well, I meant it all, every word.” Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another- acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, and even teacher, for you have learned much from one another in these last few years. Now you shall say a few words that take you across a threshold of life, and things will never quite be the same between you. For after these vows, you shall say to the world, this- is my husband, this- is my wife.

Affirmation of Marriage

______ and _______, the joy you feel now is a solemn joy as marriage is an estate weighty with consequences both social and personal. Your marriage requires love, a word often used too freely and with weak sentimentality. For your marriage, love must be something very real, but not binding. Love between a husband and wife results in surprising freedom and enriching fulfillment. Your love allows you to see things we cannot see. You see beneath the surface and observe qualities in one another that make you different and dearer than all others. Your loving eyes view the inner beauty and see and know what is seen and known by no other.

This love is dynamic. _____ and _____, you must not fear, but rather embrace the changes that comes with the growth of your love. The love of husband and wife generates the courage and confidence needed to live together within the embracing bond of marriage. Cultivate your affection and consideration for one another to give you strength when drawing upon your capacity for self-sacrifice, patience and forbearance,

Marriage is a dedication. You give yourself, your life and your love into the trusting hands of the one you love. You bestow this gift generously. Likewise, each of you receives this boundless gift, the life and love of the other. A gift you received from your families who nurtured you and your friends who are joined in loving friendship and support for your marriage.

Statement of Intent

_____ and _____, the promises you declare now will cross the years and touch the lives of many people and help them to develop a true sense of love, honor and commitment. Do you intend to pledge yourselves to one another in marriage?

We do.

Please turn to one another and join hands. <Bride / Groom> please repeat after me.

I, _______, take you _________,
to be no other than yourself.
Loving what I know of you,

trusting what I don't yet know;
With respect for your integrity

and faith in your abiding love for me;
In all that life may bring us,
I pledge my love all the rest of our days.

Made from metals drawn from deep within the earth, may these rings remind you that your love, also, must be drawn from deep within you. Forged in heat and with great effort, may these rings remind you that your marriage is also crafted daily and tempered in the forge of daily giving and forgiving. Bright like the sun, may these rings remind you that your love is meant to illumine your lives. Round like arms that embrace, may these rings remind you that human love is a gift to this world.

_____, please repeat after me as you place the ring on _____‘s finger.

_____ I give you this ring

as a symbol of my love.

As it encircles your finger,

may it remind you always

that you are surrounded by my enduring love.

___ and ___ expressed their desire to face the future with honesty and integrity. They recognize that marriage involves individual sacrifice so that two people can harmonize as one. Sacrifice should never entail a dissolution of one's deepest held values, but at times it can cause sour feelings, bitterness and perhaps result in a heated explosion. Therefore:

To symbolize the sourness, I place this lemon upon your tongues.

To symbolize the bitterness, I place a drop of vinegar on your tongues.

To symbolize the potential for heated conflict, I place this cayenne on your tongues.

Yet you can endure all of this, the difficult times ahead as friends and lovers, because of the sweetness your commitment brings to your union. A sweetness that endures through all of these three flavors.

To symbolize the power of the sweetness of your union, I place this honey on your tongues. Savor the sweetness and the ability it has to eliminate the sour, bitter and the heat of conflict. Our hopes for you this day are that the strength of your relationship ensures that days of joy and bliss far outnumber any moments of bitterness and conflict.

We cannot know what the future may bring to _____ and ____, but our hopes and dreams go with them. May they find patience in times of stress, strength in times of weakness, courage in times of discouragement, vision in times of doubt, and in all times an abiding love. We hope the inspiration of this hour will not be forgotten and their love endure.

As ____ and ____ have declared their intent to be married and symbolized their pledges with the giving and receiving of rings, in the presence of these witnesses it is my honor and joy to pronounce them husband and wife. You may now kiss your bride!