 There are times when a symbolic wedding ceremony that
does not result in a legal marriage is deemed appropriate or considered
necessary. Some couples simply wish to declare themselves to one another and
their loved ones while feeling the state's role in marriage is unnecessary or
even unwelcome. Some couples have a legal impediment to marriage that has not
been successfully resolved before their planned wedding date. In such cases, the
couple simply signs a waiver stating the ceremony is symbolic in nature and does
not confer the legal status of marriage. Both the couple and I retain copies of
the waiver in the event anyone has any question regarding their status.
There are very few changes made to render a wedding
ceremony symbolic. The words 'marriage,' 'matrimony,' 'husband,' and 'wife' are
replaced with words such as 'union,' 'partnership,' 'bond,' 'relationship,'
etc... The conclusion of the wedding announces the couple "united in their love
from this day forward" rather than proclaimed husband and wife. Below is an
example of a symbolic ceremony so you can see how these changes affect the
wedding ritual. Whether a legal marriage ceremony or a symbolic wedding
ceremony, the couple still has the opportunity to personalize the service so it
reflects the regard they have for one another and their relationship.
Presentation of the Bride
Who
presents this woman at her wedding this day?
Opening
Words
We are gathered here this day, not to witness a beginning of what
shall be, but to celebrate and affirm what already is. (Bride) and (Groom) have
invited you to share the public declaration of what has already been united in
their hearts. Their respective families, together with their friends, each
represent a circle of love where members care for, and nurture each other, in
times of joy and in times of sorrow. Today, they join their lives together to
make a new circle of love, one that overlaps with, and is made stronger by those
from which it has emerged. You have been invited here because of their special
relationship with you, to witness the creation of this sacred bond. (Bride) and
(Groom) come to this union with the greatest of gifts and are ever grateful for
the blessings that are their children _____, _____, and _____. Their wedding
today celebrates the joy and beauty of life and the regard they share for their
friends and family.
Declaration of Intent
(Bride)
and (Groom), this covenant is one that can be entered into only by persons who
are spiritually free to offer themselves to each other. Therefore, I ask you to
state your intention. Have you come here freely and without reservation to give
yourselves to one another for the rest of your days?
Affirmation of the Couple
(Bride) and (Groom), you have made the decision to proclaim your ultimate
regard for one another publicly. Your love has grown to the point where it
cannot be contained within two hearts, but must generate a larger circle of
love. Your decision is not taken lightly, but reverently. You have shared with
me your desire to embrace both the joys and the trials that constitute a healthy
union.
You have acknowledged that your relationship consists of not only a spoken
pledge on this day, but a life-long commitment to companionship and utmost
regard. Each of you now gazes upon the face of the person each holds most dear
in this life. Hold the vision of this moment in your memory and trust that the
face you look upon now will grow more beautiful with time, experience, wisdom
and love.
(Bride) and (groom), it is our wish for you today that you will always trust,
respect and celebrate one another. That you will grow and change together by
unselfishly encouraging, appreciating, nurturing and supporting one another.
You must always remember that life guarantees change. When we love, we do not
love all the time the same way. When love wanes, act loving and it will return.
When irritation creeps in, act compassionate and it will recede. Life gives us
the gifts of transition and growth and you must embrace the changes and trust
that these changes will strengthen your marriage. How we act influences how we
feel. Remain mindful of how you treat one another, not just the words you speak.
Exchange
of Vows
(Groom)
and (Bride), this covenant is meant to be a beautiful and sacred expression of
your love for each other. As you pledge your vows to each other, and as you
commit your lives to each other, we ask that you do so in all seriousness, and
yet with a deep sense of joy; with the deep conviction that you are committing
yourselves to a dynamic growing relationship of trust, mutual support, and
caring love.
(Bride)
please look into (Groom)’s eyes as you repeat after me.
I
love you (Groom)
with all my heart and soul,
as you are everything
that I could hope to find in a man.
I
am proud to have you
as my life's partner.
I promise I
will always be at your side.
Before these witnesses,
I
promise to love you without reservation,
comfort you in times of distress,
encourage you to achieve your goals,
laugh with you and cry with you,
grow with you in mind and spirit,
always be honest with you,
and cherish you
for as long as we both shall live.
(Groom) please
look into (Bride)’s eyes as you repeat after me.
I
love you (Bride)
with all my heart and soul,
as you are everything
that I could hope to find in a woman.
I
am proud to have you
as my life's partner.
I promise I
will always be at your side.
Before these witnesses,
I
promise to love you without reservation,
comfort you in times of distress,
encourage you to achieve your goals,
laugh with you and cry with you,
grow with you in mind and spirit,
always be honest with you,
and cherish you
for as long as we both shall live.
Blessing
of the Hands
(Bride)
and (Groom), please hold one another's hands with the palms facing up, so you
may see the gift they are to you. These are the hands of your best friend, young
strong and full of love that holds yours on your wedding day as you promise to
love each other all the days of you life. These are the hands that will work
along side yours as you build a future together. These are the hands that will
passionately love you and care for you throughout the years. These are the hands
that will hold you when fear or grief torments your mind, and, with the
slightest touch will comfort you like no other. These are the hands that will
give you strength when you struggle, and support and encourage you to chase your
dreams. These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children, and help keep
your family together as one. These are the hands that will, countless times,
wipe the tears from your eyes, tears of sorrow and tears of joy. These are the
hands, that even when wrinkled with age, will still be reaching for yours, still
giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch
May these hands we see before us this day be blessed. May they long be held by
one another remaining tender and gentle. May these hands continue building a
relationship founded in love, rich in caring, and devoted in reaching for
perfection. May (Bride) and (Groom) see the hands that will hold their rings as
healer, protector, shelter and guide.
Blessing
of the Rings
May I have
the rings please?
As circles
have no beginning and no end, rings have naturally come to symbolize eternal
love within the union of mind, body and spirit that constitutes the sanctity of
union between man and woman. (Groom) and (Bride) have chosen wooden rings as an
outward sign of their internal commitment. The material used to make these rings
had a previous noble life before its transformation to a new life of beauty
reminding us that the gifts of nature and the creativity of humankind can come
together in ways that ennoble us and honor our world. These rings are symbols
that remind us of the sun that shines above us and the Earth beneath us. They
are freely offered as gifts of faith and hope as visible signs of the promises
given this day. In this moment, bring blessings to these rings to be symbols of
unity, commitment and renewal.
Exchange
of Rings
(Groom), please
look into (Bride)'s eyes, repeating after me, as you place the ring upon her
finger.
As this ring
has no end,
neither shall
my love for you.
This is a
symbol of my love and faithfulness
With this ring
I pledge to you
all that I am
and all I will ever be.
(Bride), please
look into (Groom)'s eyes, repeating after me, as you place the ring upon his
finger.
As this ring
has no end,
neither shall
my love for you.
This is a
symbol of my love and faithfulness
With this ring
I pledge to you
all that I am
and all I will ever be.
Blessing
of the Union
May that wonder residing in all who love, reside in you
and bless you and keep you. May it fill you with joy and a compassionate spirit.
May all that is good and right and true, abound in your lives and abide in your
hearts through the changes of time and fortune. May your union be granted
harmony and strength forever.
Declaration
As you
have publicly declared your intent to join your lives together before these
witnesses, have sealed your vows in the giving and receiving of rings, I do
hereby proclaim you are united in your love from this day forward. You may kiss
your bride.
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Symbolic Ceremony
